Bill Wilson: I've been standing here all afternoon asking myself the same question. Why? I look out the window and I watch all the normal people walking by. It's funny, I don't think I've ever felt really normal all my life... I mean like other people. I feel different, somehow. Like I don't quite measure up. Ever since I can remember I've had this feeling... deep down in my gut. Scared. I see people... laughing, at ease with each other. I'm on the outside looking in. Afraid, maybe, that I won't be accepted. And then, overseas, I found that a drink... a few drinks... makes me feel comfortable. Like I always want to feel. Gives me courage... to be with people... do things... to dream. The money, the success, the respect, it was all good for a while, but it never seemed enough. I always want... doubles of everything to make me feel alive, worthwhile inside. And then... it all began to slip away. I feel cheated. Angry. Always so full of fear. So I drank... more... and it makes it okay for a while. I convince myself that things will turn around tomorrow. Soon. That I'll make it all up for you, but it only gets worse. I... I keep promising you... others, myself, that's it, no more, going on the wagon, THAT'S IT! And I think I mean it, but... but the guilt... and the depression... I can't look in a mirror... or at you... especially... especially at you. I've stopped believing in everything. People. God. Myself. I know it sounds insane, Lois, but in spite of all this, what I want right now more than anything else... is another drink.
The entrance to the Oracle at Delphi were written the words, “Know Thyself.” the master came along and added a sense of urgency and consequence to the ancient idea when he said, “If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.”What the master is saying is If we bring out of ourself our child within us, what we bring out our child will save us. If we do not bring out what is in us our child within, that what we do not bring out our secrets will destroy us. recovery is serious business, with serious consequences. our lives hangs precariously in the balance, teetering between a state of unconscious sleepwalking in dissociations and eyes-wide-open recovery enlightenment. The fact that most people do not see life this way testifies to how deeply asleep and in denial we truly are.
Within each of our forms lies our child within. Apart from our physical appearance, personality, gender, history, occupation, hopes and dreams, comings and goings, there lies an eerie silence, an abyss of stillness charged with an etheric presence. For all of our anxious business and obsession with triviality, we cannot completely deny this child within at our core. And yet we do everything we can to avoid its stillness, its silence, its utter emptiness and intimate embrace.
To remain unconscious of our child within is to be trapped within an ego-driven wasteland of conflict, strife, and fear that only seems customary because we have been brainwashed into a state of suspended disbelief where a shocking amount of hate, dishonesty, ignorance, and greed are viewed as normal and sane. But it is not sane, not even close to being sane. Nor is it based in reality. In fact, nothing could be less real than what we human beings call reality.
By clinging to the mind in the form of memory and thought, we are held captive by the movement of our conditioned thinking and imagination, all the while believing that we are perfectly rational and sane. We therefore continue to justify the reality of what causes us, as well as others, immeasurable amounts of pain and suffering.
Deep down we all suspect that something is very wrong with the way we perceive life but we try very, very hard not to notice it. And the way we remain blind to our frightful condition is through an obsessive and pathological denial of our child within -- as if some dreadful fate would overcome us if we were to face the pure light of truth and lay bare our fearful clinging to illusion.
The question of our child within is everything. Nothing could be more important or consequential -- nothing where the stakes run so high. To remain unconscious of being is to remain asleep to our own reality and therefore asleep to reality at large. The choice is simple: awaken to our child hidden within or sleep an endless sleep.
What Jesus is saying is If you bring forth what is the child within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is the child within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you. recovery is serious business, with serious consequences. our lives hangs precariously in the balance, teetering between a state of unconscious sleepwalking in dissociations and eyes-wide-open recovery enlightenment. The fact that most people do not see life this way testifies to how deeply asleep and in denial we truly are.
Within each of our forms lies our child within. Apart from our physical appearance, personality, gender, history, occupation, hopes and dreams, comings and goings, there lies an eerie silence, an abyss of stillness charged with an etheric presence. For all of our anxious business and obsession with triviality, we cannot completely deny this phantasmal essence at our core. And yet we do everything we can to avoid its stillness, its silence, its utter emptiness and intimate embrace.
To remain unconscious of our child within is to be trapped within an ego-driven wasteland of conflict, strife, and fear that only seems customary because we have been brainwashed into a state of suspended disbelief where a shocking amount of hate, dishonesty, ignorance, and greed are viewed as normal and sane. But it is not sane, not even close to being sane. Nor is it based in reality. In fact, nothing could be less real than what we human beings call reality.
By clinging to the mind in the form of memory and thought, we are held captive by the movement of our conditioned thinking and imagination, all the while believing that we are perfectly rational and sane. We therefore continue to justify the reality of what causes us, as well as others, immeasurable amounts of pain and suffering.
Deep down we all suspect that something is very wrong with the way we perceive life but we try very, very hard not to notice it. And the way we remain blind to our frightful condition is through an obsessive and pathological denial of our child within -- as if some dreadful fate would overcome us if we were to face the pure light of truth and lay bare our fearful clinging to illusion.
The question of our child within is everything. Nothing could be more important or consequential -- nothing where the stakes run so high. To remain unconscious of being is to remain asleep to our own reality and therefore asleep to reality at large. The choice is simple: awaken to our child hidden within or sleep an endless sleep.
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